Warmness On The Soul

Warmness On The Soul

I blog a lot these days, don't I? It's only cause tests are coming up the next two weeks and I wouldn't be able to blog then. I AM friggin worried because my hardworking study moods seem to tire me as they just DON'T seem to return when I need them to. >.<

I've got this HUGE SPASM of uncontained exhiliration to share!!~ You know the song Warmness On The Soul by Avenged Sevenfold? I finally managed to compose the whole song on piano, with the help of sea monster's phone playing and replaying the song. It's my own version though and it's not written. It's in my head, I hope I remember it FOREVER so I can play it next time for my cucu-cicit and if I'm not gonna marry, then the orphanage centre. That'd be uber cool! They're probably a few notes missing and I kinda altered it a little. I'm playing the guitar part on piano and the melody after the solo in lieu of the piano part cause it's dull. And it just hit me that the end actually consists of a whole load of broken chords, only they switched the position of the notes. It's preposterously fast but I'm getting the hang of it. It's a splendid and wonderful accomplishment! =D

Yeah, and I bet you're like going all, "Right, big deal" but like, I don't care. teehee. I don't appreciate people thinking it's another useless piece of frivolity, cause it really isn't. In fact, I want a trophy, and I don't mean the ice cream. I want a LARGE silver trophy with my name engraved on it in purple...... as a token of recognition for all the sweat and frustration I've put up with.. hahaha.. hmm.. Oh, and I need a singer to sing so I don't get out of tempo.

Anyhoo, right now, I just about have the constitution of a dying butterfly. I'm having one of my excruciating strawberry jam periods and my tummy hurts uncontrollably. I look grey-faced and subdued, in a fuelled-with-desperate-need sorta way. Someone help me through exam week pleaseeeee...

*sobs gingerly*

(ouch)

>=(

Unequivocally Clarified

Unequivocally Clarified

I am SO sorry about my last post.

The truth is, I know you love me, and it really is all that simple. I love you too.

To all readers, what can I say? No one said it was easy discovering the simplicity that lingers amidst complexity. I know it seems like every little thing seems to leave me intrusively unimpervious to the pain which never even had to exist when sometimes it seems like nothing was ever even wrong. I need a teacher. Hmm, Jay, will you be my think-free teacher? haha.. I have a feeling that I think a tad too much.

That last post, Gee, what am I, like emo now? *slaps face* GET AWAY FROM ME EMO-nity! i don't want youuuuuuuuuuuu. (shoo)

It's late. It's morning. Yippee! I'm so infused with calm. laaaaaaa~

Having exposed my utter stupidity,

please - (interrogative form of) to beg, beseech, plead, implore, supplicate or entreat) - forgive me.

Sleep well all~ I know I will =)

Is it wrong to cry?

Is it WRONG to be imperfect? Why can't you see that I live e-v-e-r-y-d-a-y wishing that the earth could swallow me up so I could D I E Why can't you hear me cry every. single. FUCKING. night. Why can't you know what's WRONG with me and know every thing about her? Why can't you save me from all I that am if you think I've never been good enough? Why can't you just kill me with a bloody knife so it would burn less than with your words?

Is it not nearly enough that I care so much about you that you need to kill this smile?

Why can't you just accept that I can never be your darling baby girl you dream of every night, wishing that I would grow to be JUST. LIKE.
HER.

Why can't you just let me cry.

Xin Nian Kuai Le

Xin Nian Kuai Le

So this is how I spent CNY. pretty bummed cause I couldn't spend it with friends but I still had a blast.

The trip to Sibu started off with Michael falling asleep. haha.. adorable =)

And this is Mark, about to sleep. handsome fellow =)


Me, getting some of my own. *yawn*


Unfailing, unconditional, everlasting love.


bored bored.

pretty mommiekins.

Food for your soul..... *drumroll* NINI!!!! exquisite local culinary (Mark's favourite)

HONK IF YOU LOVE PIZZA! *honk honk* patutla byk sgt org honk hari ya.

Say hello to my pretty HILLY.

Purple cosmetic bag. PRETTY right? =D

Chick novel. LOL

Body Glove pencil case, poofed-up baggy-waggy, specs and contacts case.

Wow, if I could paint this . . .

IM BORED. help~

cute shoe shot^^

Booyah!

Upon our arrival, we were greeted warmly by Dear Mama! I talked to her, she complained about her difficulties in poo-poo-ing and I advised her to take more fruits. Then,she said she couldn't. Cause she has diabetes and fruits are really sweet. So I asked her to drink more water, and she said if she did, she'd have to go pee too often and her legs were painful. So I asked what happened to them and she showed me a large scar on her right leg. She said the doctor cut it open and took some veins for her heart because she had heart problems. She's one strong lady. I LOVE HER!

See this is what I love about Sibu, the simplicity <3>

These are pics of my cousins. see, that's me and my sister.

My shirt was so over-sized. Che che looks so pretty!

Donald, Daffy, Duckydoo, Chickadee and Chickadeedoodle.

Me in my PJs. mommie gave it to me on Valentine's Day. It's silk and it's comfy =)

hmmm. curls?

Fireworks! Lovely and NOISY.

greeeeeen

Visiting. Erm, half of daddie, Yi yi Josephine and Sylvia.

So daddie told me this story. During the zaman pemerintahan Raja Brooke, most of the villagers tried to run away as far as they could, when the British people asked them where they were going, they said, "gotta go, cannot wait". Cannot wait. That's how Kanowit got its name. haha, its daddie's hometown. We went there by car.

More visiting. Ah Siew Gu gu and daddie

Ah Ting Jie Jie, Ah Di Koko, and Michael.

Daddie and Uncle Himpo aka HIPPO! ^^

Ah Fen Jie Jie

I got an "o ce" But I don't know how. hmm.

Beautiful. St Mary's church. Stupid car was in the way.

This is the riverside. First impression - EW GROSS right? But I admire those people who work. It's all so simple and so wonderful.

Let me tell you a story. I was there to witness this. Some lady dropped her umbrella in the waters and got worried. See that old man over there? in the pink circle? He doesn't even KNOW the clumsy lady. Yet, he went down there to get it for her. Most people wouldn't even care, you know? It's sad that some people feel that the prosaic side of life is so incongrous to this new era, cause it's in the days of old, that the beauty of the heart truly lies within =)

It's REAL! It's REAL! The swan's REAL! haha sakaiiii.. no lah.

Aerofoil boat. Let's learn Physics. According to Bernoulli's Principle, the boat is made in the shape of the aerofoil so that the air speed above the boat is greater than below. The difference in air speed causeslower air pressure below. Therefore, a net upward force or lift is resulted and the boat does not sink. =P

Gorgeous picture.

One of the best things about Sibu is Yi Yi Joan Joan's famous potato. I have this potato fetish I tell you.

I had to upload this one. I look so Chinese here, I look little and vulnerable. heh.

We went to Sarikei by ferry. We went to Bintangor too. To kill time. GAHH... BOREDOM.

Check it out y'all, I own a Telecommunications Centre. Cool or what?

Michael in the castle!

Ahhh, the joy.

Mommie and Mama <3>

AND then, we went back home!

A few things I've learnt about Sibu :

1. People there are REALLY frank about their feelings. Like there was this lady who stepped into a shoe shop, looked around and said "Chou se ren" REALLY loud and stalked off. Hrm.

2. Girls my age are OBSESSED with 5 inch heels and apparently humongous bell-bottoms are the "in" thing.

3. When you're in the car, and it stops halfway due to traffic. Take a look out the window. Everyone from other cars WILL stare. Trust me.

4. When the electricity goes off in church, everyone will start looking around for 5 minutes minimum and they look at you in a weird way if you're not looking around like they are.

Anyway, I'm glad to be home, I need my privacy. My room in Sibu is connected to Michael's and he's really cute and all, but he's an INCESSANT BABBLER who loves to lurch himself at me and attack by digging his nails into my skin and scratching my face. With all the wood in the house acting as great sound reflectors, I hardly got any sleep at all. You have no idea how many times Mark screams, " You silly bong-head" to Michael per day. With him around, there would be no need for nuclear weapons in North Korea. And hey, I should be worrying about Korea but I read in the papers that Chris Cornell has officially left Audioslave due to -get this- "irresolvable personality conflicts and musical differences. Oh nooo, what's the band gonna do without him?!

Kay I'll stop here. Happy Chinese New Year all! Gong Xi Gong Xi.

PS : Best friend, thanks for accompanying me throughout the late nights. Mwaks.

Valentine's

Valentine's Day

Happy V-Day All! especially my dearest puak 13!
We had a fab time today in school.

You can see structural formulas on the board behind. heehee. one big happie family. but pol was sick, poor pol pol. and why isn't samo in this pic?!

cake. chocolate. yum.


gifts of the members of puak 13. purrty huh? =)

my valentine gave me a white gold ring today. bwahaha! =P you can't really see it, but it's a flower. Brings out the feminine side of me doesn't it? i LURVE IT! THAT'S IT! I'm never taking it off! fine, except during school. *sulk*

dear ahbee drew a pic for me. Does she look like me? heehee, he tried to draw a portrait of me too, and he said my features were difficult to draw because I'm too beautiful =) He's such a sweetie.

Best Valentine's Day so far. A very memorable one even if I'm single. Love is everywhere in my life. And I can't believe I've never truly seen it before. So couples, don't forget to go home, give mom and dad a hug and kiss, and tell all your friends you love them. Mommie and Daddie, Cheche Jessie and dear brothers Mark & Michael, the family of puak 13, all friends in my life,

from the deepest part of my heart,

I

U